Saturday, January 29, 2011

It's A Lovely Saturday Morning and...

You're snug in bed. The covers are perfectly tucked and the temperature is so warm, you'd have to be insane to get up. You're not quite asleep because the hour is coming when you'll have to wake up. With a light turn of your body, you settle into a position that inevitably will lead you into a deep slumber. Your mind starts to slip away and a floating sensation sets in. Traveling into the realm of unconsciousness...

SUDDENLY A LOUD ASS DOG STARTS BARKING LIKE MAD FROM THE NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE. THE WORKERS' MACHINES ADD TO THE SYMPHONY OF DISSONANCE. THE BARKING GETS LOUDER AND LOUDER AND MORE FREQUENT AS YOU HEAR THE MACHINES GET CLOSER AND CLOSER TO YOUR WINDOW.

There's nowhere to go but "up".

Up, out of bed, out of the warmth, away from possibly sixty more minutes of the best sleep known to man. Just imagine the "The Blue Danube Waltz" playing in the background and the dog barking during the in-between spots.

"Into the bathroom (THE DOG BARKING)
And through the hallway (THE DOG BARKING)
Into the kitchen (THE DOG BARKING)
Then grabbing the gat (THE DOG BARKING)
Across the front yard (THE DOG BARKING)
Cocking the hammer (THE DOG BARKING)
And then finally silence as the cops take you away..."

Don't get me wrong, I love animals but chaining up your dog early in the morning every Saturday for three hours for months while your workers tend to the yard after receiving a complaint from the city is just not COOL!

1 comment :

  1. Thats exactly what i wanted to do yesterday, but I'm thinking anti freeze, and not just for the dog:) but seriously, it was getting old a year ago and now it's getting ridiculous!

    Im not a fan of chaining a dog up outside to begin with, that's not a pet that's an animal held captive for your security needs. Why the f*** do they think he's barking all day? He wants in!

    It's going to stop once they're fined for it!



    Good post bear

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