Saturday, December 31, 2011

Happy New Year!

First, I want to thank everyone who supported this blog. Watching it grow and meeting other bloggers has been such a highlight this year. I can't wait to network with more people and continue downsizing my blogs to focus more on this one come 2012--which is like TOMORROW!

This year went by so fast and I know it had to do a lot with getting married and going on our honeymoon in Thailand. I will never forget the feeling I had on my wedding day--it was the best day of my life. I still haven't even contemplated on how all of my family and friends were in the same place at the same time. I could literally cry for hours if I really think of my mother, father and brothers all being together again. It was like a dream. I remember being this little girl with pigtails dancing in my room, glancing out of my bedroom door, seeing one brother at the desk, the other in his bed reading a book. I can hear the music playing from our music room and visualize my dad playing his drums and my mom singing to Chaka Khan.

Flash forward--baby girl--all grown up. Standing in her wedding dress with her father glancing to his side asking if she's ready. My mom (the maid of honor) waiting for me, my brothers and sister-in-law sitting in the left front row eagerly waiting. My step-dad sitting with them. Understanding that time has a way of parting families and bringing them back together again. Once we were 5 people, then 6, then 7 and now 8--the eighth, my handsome groom waiting for me down the aisle. Our dearest friends standing up for us and my new and very lovely family sitting in the right front row.

These images and feelings are burned into my mind. They carry me when I am down. They give flight to my dreams. They are how I know I must have done something right in this life. When people ask me if I was scared turning 30 - I say, no not really. I got married, got to see my family and visited Asia for the first time. How could any part of that be sad?

The thing about getting older, my mother says, is that you cannot live if you don't age. I am looking forward to another year of life--whether it has obstacles, trials, great times, beautiful moments, life-changing decisions-- because in the end, the happiest times of our lives are what we leave with, when we go into the sky.

Happy New Year! 2012!

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Thankful List

I've seen these on a couple of blogs I've read and I thought it was a good idea to do one on mine. I started a new job this month and haven't had much time to update my blog. Now that I am getting used to my new schedule, I can resume life between living...the blog, that is:)

I am thankful for...

-Brian's warm hugs and face which light up my life everyday
-Spending Christmas with my mom and Stan--our laughter
-My thoughtful parent in-laws and family who made this Christmas so
special for us even though we couldn't travel to Michigan this year
-My network of girlfriends who just with their smiles make
my life that much richer
-My new yoga mat, strap and block from Santa
-The new sushi restaurant that opened down the street
-Returning to my Alma mater UCLA to work and the nice
people (including my boss) who I have met
-The sweet phone call from my nieces 
-S.T.O.R.M - my family who although we are scattered across the
states are always together in our love for each other and the
experiences we share
-Me--not in a conceited kind of way but in the way that I am
happy to be here, alive, breathing and awake


I hope everyone had a lovely holiday season. Even if you don't celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah or Kwanzaa--at least this is a time to spend with those you love and we are so blessed to have another year of life--another year of time!



Friday, December 9, 2011

Downsizing my blogs...

Experimentation is a good thing. Having all my hands in one cookie jar is great. However, with the new year approaching and new adventures in my life beginning, I have decided to delete almost all of my blogs except for this one. I love The Sauce Junkie blog but I can post recipes about my obsession with sauce here. My 405 fwy blog was great emotionally because I felt like I was getting back at the freeway which ruined my love for driving. The Crimson Clock...which I just created - I may keep for now but am not sure how often I will update it. I own the domain so maybe instead of a blog, I can make t-shirts or something that are specific to that time of the month. We'll see.

All I know is that I love the support I've received for all of my blogs but I don't want to spread myself too thin. I want to focus more on regularly updating this site even if it's once to twice a week. For some reason, I always feel like if I don't have something profound to say then I shouldn't blog but some of the most engaging blogs I've read have been on the everyday hustle and bustle of life.

So I think I will let the other blogs linger on for a week and then BAM...consolidation time!




I Love being a goofball with my mom

Thursday, December 1, 2011

We're Performing Tonight!

My band In Lieu Of is performing at The Other Door (8:30pm) in North Hollywood tonight and I am very excited. It's also a special time because my brother and sis are flying in from Michigan and will be attending the show. It's going to be a family affair with music, singing and lots of fun.

My preparation: I ran this morning, did yoga and will have lots of tea. I will try not to talk so much during the day and practice a little bit on my keyboard. Other than that I'm going to relax until it's time to rock out. 

You can check us out and "like" us at Facebook and My Space. See you tonight!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Today Is My Mom's Birthday

I had so much fun this past weekend hanging out with her. We went to dinner and then watched a band play. The dinner was fun but we were so appalled at the servings. We ordered two appetizers - salmon bites and crab cakes - and they served us one crab cake to split. The salmon bites were only enough to fill a small cereal bowl.

After we vowed never to eat in the dining room again, we walked across to the bar to watch the band play. It was nice to see my mom mingling with friends as she made her way through in the audience. She sings at this venue all of the time and instead of having to put on a show, she was able to relax and enjoy herself for the evening.

Dancing with my mom was so much fun. We always make funny faces and mimic each other. We also had a great time watching other people dance. In fact, that's one of my favorite parts about going out. There was Mr. Roger's Neighborhood dancing in his argyle sweater. Ms. "Too Short" dress pulling it down at every second doing some weird booty moves. Hellboy looming over us while we were dancing by the stage. Who can forget George Costanza singing all the lyrics to Black Eyed Peas but forgetting to keep the rhythm of the beat.

Sigh...Smile...Good Times!

                                           Happy Birthday Mommy!

Sunday, November 13, 2011

When I Stumble Upon My Old Journals...

I am greeted with something so familiar.

I can feel the same emotions I felt--anxiety, sadness, anticipation, loneliness, happiness--and it makes me feel comforted.

I feel lucky to have written down events of the past because they somehow help me to understand the present.

I have so many selves and they all blend together and all still exist individually.

It reminds me of staring into a mirror with another mirror behind me.

There are so many versions present at the same time.

To write is to live.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

11/11/11

11/11/11 is a holiday for me. Eleven has been my favorite number every since I can remember. Sometime in junior high, I coined the alias "Eleveness" and have used it since. "Eleven" is for my favorite number and "ess" is the first letter of my name spelled out. My zodiac sign, Aquarius, is the eleventh sign and I was born at 1:17am. 7 is also a favorite of mine so this came as a shock to me when my mom showed me my birth certificate.

Having said all of that, I am truly looking forward to celebrating something that occurs every hundred years. Another coincidence is that eleven is also Brian's favorite number and the number he used for playing sports his whole life. I really thought he was just copying me when he said it was his favorite number but after I saw proof, I was in awe.

At 11:11 on 11/11/11, I plan on being with my love celebrating life, happiness and all things coincidental.


*I started a new blog and am seeking followers. It an experiment because I've found another voice. It's called The Crimson Clock and it's a "Period Blog" not as in punctuation...

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Sometimes...


Doing something simple can be so much more fulfilling than an elaborate plan
Just laughing with family and friends can be the most exciting thing in the world
A good cry is all you need to begin again
Not crying can be the best choice for the moment
You can be strong without being forceful through embracing gentleness and ease
Things that seem complicated are actually really simple when you think about it
The most beautiful person in the world is staring back at you in the mirror
We do things our parents do without even knowing it and all we can do is laugh

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Costco: Love It & Hate It



I went to Costco a few days ago and found myself experiencing two intense emotions: 
 excitement for finally stocking up on items we needed for the house 
 and 
 frustration because of how people drive their carts. 

If you live in a place like Los Angeles where you experience a nervous breakdown on the freeways everyday, you'll understand me when I say that the some people at Costco navigate their carts like bad drivers. 

It's not like they're speeding or anything, it's more of their lack of awareness that there are people behind them, to the side, in front and they have no sense of sharing the road. They stop abruptly and expect you to read their minds. Can't you hear those Bagel Bite samples calling their names? Don't you realize that if they don't abandon their cart right this second, that lasagna might grow legs and walk away?

I get frustrated but at the same time when I'm there, a kind of daze comes over me. I have my list of five or so things that I buy and then I end up putting five more things into my cart (especially when I hit the wine aisle) justifying why we (or I) really need those items. Then I start seeing gifts I can get for people and since the holidays are coming up--a new perspective on shopping enters our brains during this time. 

Once I hit the register and load my items onto the conveyor belt, I talk myself out of three things because I know that I really don't need them. By the time I get to the car, I'm beat and glad to get out of that place. That's just the end of my Costco experience for that day. Now I have to get on the road and deal with those same people who are now behind the wheels of their cars!

Monday, October 24, 2011

M.I.A.

I have been M.I.A. lately because I got sick the week before last and it was horrible! I hate the flu and I hate fevers and I hate it all, Lol. Unfortunately, even after the fevers stopped, my heartbeat was still accelerated so it took some time because I was able to properly sleep. Thank the universe - that has passed and I am back to normal...well almost.

They say it takes about 2 weeks to recover from the flu and the sluggishness feeling to go away and I have to admit that the sluggishness is trying to hang on to me like a beached whale on land. I'm still working out--not so much weights though--just more running, riding my bike, walking and yoga. My mind is regenerating itself and it's just taking some time until I am 100% both mentally and physically. Does anyone know what I'm talking about?

Anyhow, I just got updated on the blogs I like to read and wanted to share their sites. Reading their blogs makes me feel like I'm reading a new book everyday.

I hope they don't mind:)

http://30worthy.blogspot.com/
http://anatheimp.blogspot.com/
http://anywhere-is.net/
http://monicadockery.wordpress.com/
http://www.ohmishka.com/
http://ridingtheshortbus-kat.blogspot.com/
http://unikorna.blogspot.com/
http://zenhabits.net/ - (This is my all-time favorite blog. It has taught me so much about making progress with even the smallest of goals)



Monday, October 3, 2011

Con At The Park

I finally got to the park today. More specifically, I went to the park to write. I have been in need of a change of scenery and as much as I love the Woman Cave, nothing competes with the vast collection of trees, grass, chirping birds and the occasional loud ducks that roam around this green delicacy. The pictures from my camera phone do not do this place justice--next time I'll bring the real camera!

The idyllic setting became more and more the right decision as I made my way to a spot of grass under a shady tree. I set up my little, red blanket, grabbed my journal and began contemplating on what I was going to write in my diurnal companion. Searching for my pen I saw in my peripheral vision, a woman walking towards me. My “Uh Oh” reflex plus a heightened sense of irony came over me and before I knew it, she was saying “Excuse me…”

Let me digress…I am a nice person who loves to help people but I am also an aware person who feels like the average con person picks up on my generosity. When I become bothered, the niceness fades away and I become stern.

So back to the lady who approached me. Earlier, when I was walking over to the tree, I overheard her talking to some people sitting on a bench. I didn’t really think much of it because I thought she knew them. I could hear her say over and over, “But what am I going to do?” I thought it was a group of friends having a serious conversation so I walked a little faster to avoid disturbing them.
When I saw her walking over alone towards me, that stern demeanor swept over me and my ears became ready for her spiel. Initially, I felt bad, seeing as she was pregnant but she looked quite healthy. As soon as I heard her speak to me, I felt like she thought I was a complete idiot.
“Excuse me, I have this problem and I need help,” she said. “When I eat or drink, I throw up. The doctor said I could die when I throw up.”
I immediately replied, “Okay. So what do you need help—”
She interrupted me and said, “I throw up and I can die. I will die. I die.”
So I asked again, this time with a little more force, “I don’t have a lot of time so can you get to the point?” This whole time, I am still looking for my pen which is playing a naughty game of hide and seek with me.
She repeated again, “I throw up when I eat or drink. I could die? I die? Doctor said I could die?”
Yes, it sounded more like a question, as though she was waiting for a reaction from me that I was refusing to give. I think she repeated the word “Die” to evoke my humanity which was there but saved for someone else who wasn’t pulling a con at the park.
By this time, my patience disappeared along with my desire to recover my pen. I looked her straight in the eyes and said, “I can’t help you. Ask someone else.”
The look on her face wasn’t even sheer disappointment. It was more of a “Damn. I didn’t get to play the whole scene out” kind of expression. With that she walked away—to the next victim I presume—and I realized I could use my laptop to write. Typing is much faster than writing by hand so I wrote this blog aiming to get as much of this short interaction down as possible.

Maybe that lady really does need help but then again maybe she’s asking the wrong person or people for it and should speak to a health professional about why eating and drinking makes her throw up because clearly nausea or vomiting isn't something that can happen to pregnant women and wouldn’t she look ghastly, emaciated and completely weak with a belly if she couldn’t keep her food down? Clearly, I’m the idiot here…


Sunday, September 25, 2011

Life Between Living

If there is ever a time when I feel down or out of sorts, I think of this day and remember its greatness not just in what we became but how we all came together. 















Saturday, September 24, 2011

Greyhound

Meet Greyhound - my new favorite Autumn Sweater!


Now let's hope it keeps me warm and cozy now that my immune system has slightly weakened. Today is a tea, lemonade, soup and veggie day.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Where The Magic Happens


There are various spots in my home that I simply love. In a previous blog called The Woman Cave, I talked about how I carved out a little space for writing, contemplating and all sorts of stuff. This is where I write mostly.

THE WOMAN CAVE-->

I also have a bulletin board where I put things to remember and pictures and quotes that inspire me. Above my desk is a little inspirational corner with some spiritual books I like to refer to from time to time. If I glance to my right, a Harry Potter hangs to represent my geeky side. (Snorts and pulls her glasses up over her nose).


HE'S AN ANIMAGUS!


INSPIRATIONAL CORNER



I try to make coffee for Brian every morning before he goes to work. I put a little picture above the coffee maker with a saying from Buddha on it. "The mind is everything. What you think you become." This quote greets me in the morning and sets the tone for what will transpire as the day unfolds. Speaking of Brian - he's the best part of living in our house. Oh yeah, don't forget to glance back at the bulletin board at the top to see a picture of me and my brother Naje in DC visiting my other brother Corey. Isn't he handsome? His website is here - Tampi.com.


COFFEE FOR HE, TEA FOR ME:)


MY LOVELY
 
Being the earring junkie that I am, I have another bulletin board with my jewelry on it (or ju-ry for slang). I also have perfumes or "berfume" like I used to say when I was little. Most are gifts from my mom who loves to smell fresh and clean. I love lighting candles in this area because it's in the hallway and somehow soothes my nerves when I'm on my way to the bathroom.



 Here's a little bit of yours truly in raw form - no makeup, hair nappy, eyes closed with heart wide open!


I love sushi! Here's a pic my friend Adelia took of us a couple of nights ago at a sushi restaurant.





Sunday, September 18, 2011

Mirrors

My mom continually teaches and reminds me that when people say something negative about you it is only a reflection of how they feel about themselves. This is not a situation where you have sought out criticism but a situation where you have not and someone offers it out of the blue. It's almost like coasting on a flying carpet, happily looking around at the world and suddenly hitting the top of a pyramid, finding yourself rolling down the side. It's also like walking along a straight road, gazing at the scenery and suddenly tripping in a hole you had no idea was there.

For me, that is what this criticism feels like. When it grazes my skin, her words of wisdom spread across my soul and heart and give me flight if I feel like I've fallen. They transform my disappointment into prayer and I only hope that people who criticize others for no reason find their flying carpet or happy road with no unexpected bumps or potholes. If you're religious, this is when you go to church and pray for someone. If you're spiritual, then is when you meditate, get centered and breathe positive energy into the atmosphere hoping it can bring balance to their universe. When you have reached the point when you are completely in touch with the power of your heart, mind and thoughts, nothing can penetrate you.

We are all mirrors.  
"The mind is everything, what you think you become" - Buddha

Friday, September 16, 2011

Autumn Beauty

As my favorite season approaches, I feel inspired to create a small bucket list. As much as I love autumn, it usually zooms by and all the things I say I'm going to do end up pushed so far away until winter's gloom sets in.

But now that I actually have more time, I can take advantage of autumn's beauty and cross a few things off of this list:

- Read some of "The Elegance of the Hedgehog" on a blanket under a tree.
- Stomp on as many leaves as possible when walking or running.
- Laugh uncontrollably at Knott's Scary Farm with family and friends.
- Buy some combat boots and rock them with an orange or green scarf
- Actually carve some pumpkins and not just let them sit out until they               rot like last year, lmao.
- Visit my favorite spots and get lost in the scenery aka Reseda, Skirball, SRF.
- Go camping. 
- Find a bench like the one in the picture, sit there for hours, people watching
  or listening to my favorite tunes. (Contemplating our universe may roam
  into my mind from time to time.)

There it is. My small bucket list that I aim to complete before the dreary, cold embers of winter's melancholy invade my heart on December 21. (As you suspect, I hate winter!)
Carpe Autumnus!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Ode to Snapple Bottles


During my first year of college, my brother and I decided it would be cool to take the same class since we attended the same university. He was getting more and more into film and I liked the idea of spending time with him on campus. We enrolled in an Italian Cinema class and it turned out to be one of the funnest classes I ever took.

What made it fun wasn't just the teacher's obsession with critiquing every sex scene in the films we watched or the way he said with such aggression "Camille Paglia". It was his blindness to the fact that during almost every lecture my brother rolled Snapple bottles down the rows of the classroom.

At the beginning of class, sometimes he brought Panda Express for both of us or shared his with me. He loved juice and always had some sort of bottle with him. When he was finished with his drink, he set the bottle on its side and let it roll down clanking and clinking until it reached the bottom of the classroom. Like little kids we giggled uncontrollably. He also took the paper bag that his food or snacks were in and threw it against the wall next to us. I would be taking notes and all of a sudden hear a WHACK and look up to see my brother smiling.

The worse thing I did was say that this chick in our class looked like Marilyn Manson. I chanted under my breath, "The Beautiful People. The Beautiful People" in my brother's ear and we cracked up laughing.

We were nerds but because of this class, I will never forgot how much fun it was to go to college with my brother or the pain my stomach endured from laughing at his crazy antics.

Because of him, I felt safe in a new place. He was the reason why I was able to get into that college in the first place because he secretly sent me an application before my high school got them. He picked me up when I needed rides, took me grocery shopping, drove me to San Diego to visit home during the holidays and made the transition of leaving home at seventeen a lot easier. <3

Friday, September 9, 2011

Tonight's Bike Ride...

Was a last minute decision. I had extremely bad cramps and was about to lay up on the couch like a bear possibly with a heating pad. Somehow, my mind changed abruptly and getting a workout in convinced me I'd feel better. With Brian's help, (he puts my bicycle in the truck even though I can do it--it's really sweet! Go ahead make throw up noises, lol) I was on my way to the lake in no time.

The first half of the bike ride was a breeze! Radiohead in my ears, biking gloves on, the trees, the wind and the moon following me. I was flying! Mosquitoes were cussing me out 'cause they couldn't penetrate my forehead.

Then all of a sudden, I hit the second half of my ride and Dayum! I really had to push. It was almost completely dark and I could feel the laziness creeping into my hamstrings. My feet felt so heavy like I was riding through a tar pit but I wasn't giving up.

A quick song change to some Thrice and I chased the moon back to my car. My cramps feel so much better and now I can resume my "bear-like" activities after I wash the dishes. Wait a minute! Animals don't wash dishes!

Sunday, September 4, 2011

The Number 2 Newlywed Question

I say number two because the number one question has to do with having children right away. People who know me know that I absolutely love children but they also know I'd like to wait a couple of years before I start having them.

Now on to the second question which is...

"Do you feel different now that you're married?"

The answer...yes and no.

The "no" part has to deal with us living together for awhile (years) before we got married. We are used to each other's way of living and habits so this hasn't really changed except for the fact that we are now a married couple living together. For me, it's like driving down a highway that once had no outline and now the lines are defined and clear. Or wearing glasses and then putting contacts on for the first time. Things were visible and my life was heading somewhere but now there is a clear distinction of who we are and that we are heading there together and I love it.

The "yes" part has to deal with family. Even though we don't have kids yet, we are a family and I love saying things like "Family night" or "Family Time". The continuation of our parents--a history that is living on and becoming greater as we progress makes me feel connected to his family and he to mine--our family tree has grown in size and strength.

I always imagined my life but I never knew how the pieces would fit and it's turning out to be the greatest piece of art I could have ever imagined.

Monday, August 29, 2011

What Dreams May Come

I have been having some weird dreams lately. I am the type of person that hardly ever knows I'm dreaming when it's happening and when I wake up, I am relieved that it was only a dream.

Occasionally, I will have dreams about people who were once in my life and no longer are--those who are alive or have passed. Dreaming about the ones that have passed freaks me out because it feels like they still exist in this world. When I wake up, I can't speak to them and this makes me very sad. The flip side is at least I get to see them again even though it's only in my head and that makes me happy because they are still very much a part of my heart. 

My mom has the ability to sense things before they happen especially in her dreams. It is very strange how she channels things, people and events that have yet to come. I was once told that I had the potential to do this but I closed that gate a long time ago. I'm not quite sure why but it's most likely out of fear.

If I had to choose between dreaming and not dreaming--I'd choose not to only because I don't know I'm actually dreaming. If I was able to somehow make myself aware, I wouldn't mind it as much. I could all of sudden have wings when the monsters tried to get me. Or better yet, have today's winning lottery numbers pay me a visit!

Friday, August 26, 2011

To Hop Or Not To Hop?

Yesterday was so hot I couldn't breathe! I felt like laying over a tub of ice like a beached whale eating popsicles and getting fanned.

Today I have things to do but I may go movie-hopping later on or tomorrow. Some possible movies are Columbiana and Don't Be Afraid of the Dark. I may start with the scary one first but I like Zoe Saldana so paying for that ticket might be the way to go.

Oh wait! Just thought of something! I'll buy the Columbiana ticket but watch Don't Be Afraid of the Dark first. How sad though because I like Guillermo del Toro - decisions, decisions...I'll let the Hot Hot Heat decide.

"Talk to me! Dance with me, here! You're the spotlight girl!"

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Golden Morning

Beyond my window makes me eager to let the sun toast my skin.
I am happiest when it's bright. 
I'll always win in the light.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Travel Bucket List

I love to travel and have this dream of visiting all 7 continents. So far I've been to 2 other than the one I live on -  Asia and Europe. I have only known one person to visit Antarctica and she flew to South America and then went by sea to the continent.

I've always wondered if you're in a country or city - for example during a layover - if that counts a visiting. I was in a layover in Switzerland and was completely taken aback by seeing the Alps. Maybe next time I'll actually get the chance to ski on them.

On my bulletin board, the current places I have on my bucket list are:


Toronto
Antarctica
Paris
Iceland
Sydney
Africa
Greece
India
Italy
Space? The Moon?

All of them are definitely possible but that last one---I'm not so sure. Maybe in my lifetime Virgin Galactic will become affordable.

Some other places I'd like to add on my Bucket List are:

The Caribbean
Alaska
Amsterdam
Fiji
Paris
London

There are also a bunch of places in California and the US that I have yet to go and it makes me a little sad because it's definitely possible!

The Grand Canyon
Yosemite
Yellowstone
Mount Rushmore
Aspen
Napa Valley
Paso Robles
Montana (Don't ask me why but I've always wanted to go there, Lol)
New Orleans

Monday, August 1, 2011

Write! Rewrite:( Abandon! Start Anew!

This is the process that my writing has been going through lately. I start working on something that I feel strongly about. I'm inspired, exciting and hopeful. Then after I write a couple of pages, I print it out and read it aloud. I have no idea why but that is the make or break point for my writing. If I think what I'm reading doesn't sound good, I get frustrated, stuff it somewhere in a pile of papers, close the window on my computer and abandon it. I get mad at myself for two reasons: one, for writing something I think sucks and two, for not finishing.

When I explained my predicament to a close friend of mine, she pointed out how I put too much pressure on myself and how I shouldn't think of the outcome as necessarily a bad thing but to acknowledge the fact that I've been inspired and have 5-6 novels that I've at least started.

This really opened my eyes and made me realize that sometimes beauty of art isn't necessarily the finished product--it is the process by which an artist goes through in order to create one's work or simply, an idea. She also said this in not so many words.

The promising thing is that right now I have a novel that I have been sticking with. I've read it back to myself a couple of times and haven't decided it sucks...yet!

Secretly, in the back of my head, I think of my brother when I'm writing my stories because he has always encouraged me to write.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Why Do People in Customer Service Make Life So Difficult?

I just don't understand why people make getting things done so much more complicated and dramatic then it really should be. This post is inspired by my bank experience today which turned out great, wasn't a huge deal but seriously could have been avoided if the people who say they work for me actually worked for me.

To make a long story short - I needed to cash a check that was written to my maiden name and went to do this at a different branch that is closer to my house. I changed my name on my account to my married one and made it a huge point to tell the manager I worked with at my home branch to notate my account with both names to avoid any hassles that may occur.  I guess she forgot and the teller at the new branch wouldn't cash my check because it wasn't notated on my account. After discussing this matter for fifteen minutes, he eventually cashed it but told me "this was a courtesy" and I had to bring my marriage certificate in to show a manager in order to put a note on the account.

I had just worked out, went grocery shopping, had my bike in the car and Brian was waiting for me in the car patiently after I told him, "Oh, this shouldn't take long." YEAH RIGHT!

I'll be honest - I felt stupid standing there when this guy told me I couldn't cash my check. I was also furious because I was so happy when this branch opened up and I almost felt like closing my account and saying SCREW YOU! 

This afternoon I went back to the bank with my certificate armed and ready. It turned out to be a better experience than I expected and although I left feeling satisfied, I still couldn't help but think:

If the outcome was to be in my favor why did this teller go through all of that drama?

This incident isn't even the worse one I've had - be it grocery stores, cable bills, the bank, credit card companies, landlords, returning something, the post office - sometimes you have every thing you need and still there's a problem. I've argued with so many credit card companies over the phone to lower my interest rates and the first person is always nasty, mean and always says there's nothing he/she can do. Then they put a manager on the phone who is all nice and does whatever you need in a matter of seconds. Sometimes, you wonder - why did I go through all of that? We could have skipped the BS and went right to the point and not wasted any more time.

I am venting but sometimes I wish those experiences could be as easy as their advertisements make them sound. I don't always think it's a racial or sex thing - especially over the phone but maybe I'm aware of issues a little more because of how I used to get followed around in stores at the mall when I was a preteen or how when I was in grade school, a little girl who I played with every day all of a sudden one day told me she couldn't play with me anymore because I was black. Or maybe it was the time when someone said, " You're pretty for a black girl." These things don't define me but they resonate in the back of my head and make me understand how other people's perception of me can affect our interactions.

In short - People do your job and be nice about it and if there's a problem don't act like it's my fault for giving you my business.

Monday, July 18, 2011

I Got Everything Done Today...

That I wanted to do and it feels good.
Now I am going to enjoy a glass of wine and relax.
There are sunsets to catch and hills to drive to but I'll leave that for another day.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

I Am Feeling Very Musical Today...

So I am sharing a song I've shared before but feel like it's appropriate for my mood. Happy Wednesday to you all! (Thursday if you're in a different country)


Find more Shaharoh songs at Myspace Music

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

The Art of Movie-Hopping

When it's hot as hell or you're broke or just extremely against the $30-$40 we have to spend on a day at the movies, movie-hop. There are so many movies out now that I honestly feel like I've paid enough money. I usual pay for one movie and catch another one so I'm getting two for the price of one.

I think there should be a rule on remakes - if I've already paid money to see a movie that came out when I was a kid, I should get to see it for free because chances are it's gonna suck anyway. Also, if the sequel to a film sucks, we should get refunds. Transformers 2, Grudge 2, Iron Man 2 -- Please send me my $12.00 in the mail and make it out to CASH.

Here are a few ways to make your movie-hopping experience worthwhile:

 - Look at the show times before you go so you know what time your second (or third, Lol) movie starts. Timing is crucial.

- When you go inside, figure out which theater number you'll be going to so when you exit the first movie, you can casually enter the other one without looking lost or suspicious.

- Going to the bathroom after the first movie helps not only to relieve your bladder for the next two hours but also it's a safe spot where you can dodge workers.

-Bring your own snacks. You don't want to scarf your nachos down during the previews of the first movie, drink a large coke and crash. The concession stand peeps will probably remember seeing your face if you're the only one who likes jalapenos on your popcorn. Plan ahead and eat something substantial before you leave your house so you won't be that hungry during the first movie. If you're on the healthy tip, pack some nuts and dried fruit in your big-ass purse or the woman in your life's purse if you're a dude and bring your own water. If you're not on the healthy tip, stop at 7-11 and stock up on your favorite chips, drinks and candy.

If you're gutsy, grab a sandwich from Subway to eat during the second movie. Nothing is funnier than breaking out your delicious turkey with avocado sandwich while everyone else is munching on stale-ass popcorn and smelling the aroma of your honey-oat bread.

Last but not least...don't get caught! And if you do, so what! Life's too short to worry about getting kicked out of a movie theater. Some people have to worry about getting kicked out of their apartment because the rent check is late.

*Movie-hopping mostly works at theaters that don't have assigned seating. You're really ballsy if you try this at a stadium seating venue.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Remember To Do Nothing

Sometimes it is best to remember to do nothing. There are dozens of to-do lists, goal lists and bucket lists out there and sometimes "what we have yet to do" becomes overwhelming. Don't get me wrong, getting things done and crossing off tasks on a list can be fulfilling but every so often it is nice to simply do nothing.

No television. No phone calls. No internet. No music. No tasks. Just you, alone with your thoughts. Maybe go to a park and sit on a bench. Maybe sit in your favorite chair in your house drinking a cup of tea.

I find myself missing the quiet sounds of the day that I used be lost in as a kid. Walking on the sidewalk, climbing trees, discovering new play spots--I miss the hidden symphonies of silence and as an adult, I make it point to hear them as much as I can and to enjoy the absence of distractions.

I make it a point to remember to do nothing.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Run Drum

I haven't worked out in awhile since before the wedding and it's been killing me! I got sick two weeks before the actual wedding which left me on the couch finishing up final details and now it's time to get back in the mix. For the record, I hate running! I used to like it when I was a kid but after awhile I just began to hate it. That's a huge reason why I force myself to do it.

The two things that keep me going are my playlist and the fact that I know it's healthy. How sad, I put the playlist first! I'm just one of those people that cannot workout without music unless I'm in a class. I also love running to the beats of songs, so I plan my music accordingly. I can run faster on a treadmill so on that playlist is Incubus, Circa Survive, one Slipknot song and others. For running on ground, I stick to Hybrid, Nine Inch Nails, slower Incubus songs, Bjork, Madonna and others. I do love the scenery that accompanies running outside so I choose songs that move my soul and make me feel happy to see the green. Now that I've got my game face on, I can go run.











 *Two pics from this past weekend of us going to the park. Brian played some basketball while I got caught up on my crossword puzzle. There's nothing like a blanket, the trees and the perfect weather. Green is good for my soul.